What Are You Aiming For?

I stared at the one-inch thick pine board and sighed. I had attempted the side-kick break for what seemed like the hundredth time, but it refused to break. Aggravation mounted along with the belief that I would never accomplish the task. I was a girl. I wasn’t strong. I was new to martial arts. My list of excuses grew by the moment but the board remained the same, completely intact.

Memories of that day popped up as I read the email. My article query had been rejected…again. Suddenly the hundred rejection challenge didn’t seem like much of a challenge after all. Why bother?

No one wants to read my writing.

Frustration mounted along with a belief that I would never be a full-time writer. The field was already saturated. There was too much competition. I didn’t know the right people. My list of excuses grew like the rejection emails in my in-box, yet something about that memory from martial arts class stuck out.

When I started Taekwondo, I was only one of two females in the class, not counting our female instructor, who looked like a blonde Xena Warrior Princess. I was the only teenage girl in a room full of football players. They made board breaking look easy, but then again they had big muscles. The senior student, one step away from black belt, was walking me through the technique…again.

“Your side-kick technique is good.”

“So, what am I doing wrong?”

“You’re kicking the board.”

“Funny. What else am I supposed to be doing?”

“The board isn’t your target,” he said. He tapped the front jacket of the student holding the board. This is your target. You need to follow through on your kick. You stop when you hit the board.”

Something began to click in my brain. I was intimidated by the board, so I stopped when I got to it.

I was focusing on the wrong thing.

“The board isn’t your target. It’s the obstacle between you and your target. Try again.”

The board holder assumed position again wrapping his fingers around the top of the board with one hand and the bottom of the board with the other. He locked his elbows, holding the board forward, level with my kick height. I backed up and took my fighting stance, hands up. I took a deep breath and stepped forward into a side-kick, aiming for the holder this time. When my foot landed on the mat, the sound of applause startled me. I looked down and the board was in two pieces.

As a writer, rejection slips are just one of the obstacles between me and success as a writer. My goal is to be published, but like learning how to break a board, it requires learning the right techniques and practicing them. All the excuses about why I can’t become a published author are just obstacles that I have to break through. I can’t let them stop me.

What goals are you aiming for?

The key is keeping your eye on the goal, not on the obstacles in the way. We have to figure out how to get over, around, or through the obstacles. We have to do the work. In Taekwondo, I came to class twice a week for two hours. Every class we exercised, practiced kicks and punches, and practiced sparring. I showed up every week, and I got better with each practice. Eventually, I took a test and passed my yellow belt, which included a board break. The path to black belt included several more levels, each increasing in skills learned.

Whatever you are aiming for in life, it requires keeping your eyes on the target.

It also requires showing up and doing the work. You have to work through the obstacles; you have to work through the excuses. When you aim at the right target and follow through, you will have a break-through too.

Linda Lyle is a writer, knitter, and single mama to two crazy cats. When she is not running the office at a machine shop, she is working part-time at The Taming of the Ewe: A Yarn and Tea Boutique or scribbling ideas on her blog, The End of My Yarn.

Connect with Linda at website is https://lindalyle.com/.